Passages

During a training session.

Lady: "The students need to know how important it is to read the passages because the ones on the CST are extremely long."

Girl: "Yeeuh. They're RIDIKULUS."

Days After Christmas

Every year, my mom goes off to the stores on the 26th to see if they have any good Christmas Decorations on sale. Usually, she aims for Garlands to sent do the PI or new ornaments and whatnot.

Today, I went to Costco with my mom and sister. And when you go to Costco, you usually can't leave without a cart full of food and household items.

As we walked to the car, my mom says: "Ay, nako! My balls are estill in da truhnk." And I didn't want to be all stupid, so I just laughed in my head.

When I popped the trunk open, I said, "Whoa. You have some big balls there."
(They really were BIG tho! lol)

My sister: "That's what she said!"

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We stopped by another local store to buy bread and the country song entitled, "Landslide," was playing on KOST.

My sister: "Hey, it's the Chicksie Dicks."
Me: O_O "What did you just say?!"

That's what she said

My sister comes in my room, right before she heads to bed, snacking on some leftover Vienna sausages from dinner.

Me: "Ewww, are you gonna brush your teeth? You're gonna have sausage breath in the morning."
Sis: "That's what she said."
Me: O_o

simbang gabi, day 5

Our guest Filipino priest during his insightful homily:

Fr. Abreza: "God created the world in how may days?"
Congregation: (What I heard from my perspective) "6".."6".."6".."6"...
Fr. Abreza: "All I hear is 'Sssssshh'."
---

Fr: "God made everything good. The world...good; the animals...good; human beings...good; Me, Father Abreza...VERY GOOD!"

A job opening?... maybe....

Simbang Gabi @ St. Ann's Catholic Church w/ Will's friend, His Excellency Bishop Oscar Solis...This is how a conversation with Bishop went while preparing for Mass....

Bishop: how are you today? are you still in school?
me: o i just graduated in june..
Bishop- o what now- are you working or looking for work?
me- o yea.. just looking
Bishop- oo are you looking for work?... do you want to work?... i have a position for you
(me excited and curious i said...)
me- oo yea sure.. what kind of work?...
bishop- ook well.. let's trade positions... i'll take a vacation and you take my place for a while..i'm serious. i'll take a break and you can be bishop
(we both started laughing, however he was being serious hahahha ay nako)

THE END

I always thought I was a girl?

So, I was watching A Christmas Carol with my sisters and dad today, and then this conversation came up:

Dad: Let me see your hand.
Me: *takes out hand*
Dad: See, you can tell a man from a woman if you look at the length of their index finger and ring finger. A woman's index finger is longer than their ring finger, and a man's ring finger is longer than their index finger.
Me: But dad, my left index finger is shorter than my ring finger.
Nat: Dad, it's just genetics! Here, this is how you tell a man from a woman. Charlene, stand up.
Me: *stands up*
Nat: Look at the bottom of your foot.
Me: *looks at foot*
Nat: No, you did it the wrong way! That's how a guy looks at their foot!
Me: Dad, I think I'm a man.
Dad: *to Nat and Maine* I don't know what happened to Charlene.

Purgatory

And so the list goes on. One of the kids inquired about something the teacher mentioned:

Teacher: "You have heaven, hell and purgatory. Purgatory is kinda like...a halfway house..."

Kid: "Burgla-tory?"